* your home contains 8 cages, 10 playstands, 6 swings, and a bed.
* you are zoned as a rainforest wildlife sanctuary by your city.
* all your neighbors move away, and you live in an apartment.
* you consider collard greens, dandelion greens, parsnips, mustard green, and escarole to be common vegetables.
* you go through the store checkout with 18 different fruits and veggies (none of which you plan to eat).
* the person behind you at the checkout asks how you prepare the collard greens you're holding and you say that you haven't the slightest idea.
* you have to explain to the lawncare company that you like dandelions in your yard.
* you see absolutely nothing wrong with having every piece of furniture in your living room topped with cages while your lamp is on the floor, and you use a lapdesk because the desk itself holds your parrot toy box.
* redecorating the house means finding a way to squeeze in another bird cage.
* your garage contains extra cages, playstands, toys, but no car.
* you've ever answered the phone with a parrot on your head.
* you tell people on the phone, "I can't talk now; I've got a parrot on my head."
* people overhearing your parrot discussions think you're talking about your date.
* you drive around on recycling day looking for the biggest piles of newspaper to steal and feel guilty when people look out their windows and pity you.
* you want world peace, to save the environment, a cure for aids and a better way to clean bird poo.
* you have vases full of feathers instead of flowers.
* you have 3 tv's and none of them are for you to use.
* your cd collection contains opera, clasical, and speech lessons, none of which you listen to.
* you havent owned an alarm clock in 10 years, but never get up late.
* when your at Home Depot your busy dreaming about building new play areas.
* you have no carpet in your house, anywhere.
* you shower in the guest bathroom, because the master bath is too full of perches.
* your friends come over for dinner and offer to make a salad, to which you reply "none of those vegetables are for humans!"
* you havent taken a vacation in 10 years, and like it that way.
* every room in your home is equipped with U.V. lighting.
* your walls are lined with plexiglass, your celings are lined with plexiglass, and your floors are covered in plastic runners, and they are all still stained.
* you have replaced your vaccum at least twice a year.